Maybe it’s because I’m a 23-year-old girl living in a media-obsessed world. Maybe it’s because I see how common it is to have low self-esteem and low confidence. Maybe it’s because I dream about being a mom who raises a daughter of my own someday. This has been heavy on my heart lately:
Between a full time marketing position, a part time personal training job, and having friends and family of all ages and backgrounds, I’m around a variety of people constantly. I’ve continued to notice that it’s more acceptable to say, “I hate my thighs”, than it is to say, “My hair looks great today”. If you speak the latter, you risk the accusation of being cocky. But if you complain about your thighs, your stomach fat, or the way your arms jiggle, it’s allowed. It’s “normal”. It’s okay to have low self-esteem, but not to be confident. When did we become so disrespectful to ourselves, and others?
For some reason, this kind of talk is a lot harder to hear when it’s coming from a mom. Every time I hear a mom speak this way, who is raising a young daughter, it breaks my heart. If you constantly complain about your looks, that will eventually rub off on your daughter. Kids are smart. They will begin to think that it’s more acceptable to get down on yourself for your appearance, than it is to be confident in the things that make you, you. Parents and teachers have the most important job in the world. Those kiddos, no matter if they’re 4 months or 18 years old, are our future. Before we know it, they will be teachers, doctors, writers, lawyers, coaches, and parents, too. Do you want your daughter to be confident, fearless, and determined? Or do you want her to be timid, weak, and uncertain? Let’s turn things around and teach them confidence. Let’s be proud of ourselves and our peers when positive words are spoken. And let’s correct each other when we complain about the way we look.
Next time you catch yourself saying, “Ugh, this outfit makes me look so wide”, or “Ew, delete that photo, I look so fat”, try saying, “I did really great on my presentation today, and I’m proud of myself. Or, “I love my ability to always look on the bright side”. The things you love about yourself will always outweigh the small, petty things you dislike about your appearance. It will rub off on your daughter, too.
Disclaimer: This post is aimed towards women. It’s not to say that men don’t struggle with self esteem and confidence too. But since it’s much more common for women, and it’s a few different women that inspired me to write this blog entry, this one’s for the girls.
Special thanks to my mom for preaching confidence, and inspiring me to do anything my little heart desires.